“Goliath? … NEVER heard of her!”
Sunday I was talking with the readers on our email list about the "Goliath" in your life, staring you down and just daring you to give it your best shot.
Well, today I gonna share my Goliath with you. If you're new to the SAH blog you may not know...
... in 1997 I dropped out of high school (eventually I went back and finished).
There was a lot going on in my life at the time.
I was 17, my parents were getting a divorce, and I started working full-time to help my mother with rent and other bills.
Soon I was falling asleep in class and eventually would just skip school all together.
I mean, who has time for school when you're working full-time to help pay bills?
So I dropped out, moved out and got my own apartment. I mean, might as well, if I'm paying bills, I might as well be on my own.
I'm embarrassed to even utter these words and for a long time -- I lived in the past as this decision haunted me for years!
I let my past decisions hang over my head like a dark cloud during hurricane season in South Texas.
Fast forward 9 years...
... I'm 26 years old, I've built -- from the ground up (without anyone's help) a successful recurring 6 figure business, and I just met & started dating my future wife.
Life was good.
It was REAL good.
I wasn't living my life's purpose --
I was just working, making ridiculous-money but I was still living in the past.
Everyday, I stared at myself in the mirror at 12:30 in the morning, as I got ready to head out to run my bread route, and I would ask/tell myself things like
... I guess this is my life?
... would I be doing this if I finished school?
... you're such a loser for dropping out of high school!
... if I finished school and gone to college, I wouldn't have to be grinding like this.
And so many other stupid limiting beliefs.
To top it off:
- I was now dating this super-smart (and hot) chick who founded her own sorority at Baylor University.
- Her father has his masters degree from the University of Texas.
- All her friends are Baylor grads -- turned lawyers, doctors, surgeons, architects, and crazy successful business owners.
Every time I hung out with her and her friends I felt awkward, I felt dumb, and out of place.
I remember one night, one of her friends asked me, "So Hector, what fraternity do you belong to? What university did you graduate from?"
Painfully as I re-lived my super-dumb decision of dropping out of high school, I said, "No, I didn't go to college (while in my head I also said, I'm a loser high school drop out)."
There was awkward silence.
This Goliath stood in front of me for a long time and I didn't know how to kick this big ass f*cker in the balls and drop him to his knees.
The one good thing I had going for me at the time was Jiu-Jitsu (I was a purple belt then).
(Why I started BJJ is for another post )
When I was on the mat, I didn't feel like a loser, and I didn't dwell on my past decisions.
I felt like I had my power back as a man, like I was in complete control of my life and everything in & around it.
That's when it hit me.
If Jiu-Jitsu is where I feel alive and in control of my inner demons, I need to do everything in my power to be able to train as much and long as I can.
That's when I hit the competition scene and to support my efforts...
... I launched a life-long physical training campaign:
- I Ran half marathons.
- Paid better attention to the quality foods I put in my mouth.
- Became a yoga teacher.
- Immersed myself in everything strength, anatomy, and eventually earned my certified personal trainer (CPT) and corrective exercise specialist (CES) credentials from the National Academy of Sports Medicine (NASM).
Things got really exciting as I took things to the next-level when I found the mighty kettlebell in 2007 at the World Jiu-Jitsu championships.
You see brother...
... my Goliath was my past decision of dropping out of high school (that still tries to rear it's ugly f*cking head from time to time).
And the only time I felt in control of Goliath -- this purpose-destroying demon -- was when I was on the mat --
this is why Jiu-Jitsu is SO important to me and why I will NEVER give it up -- FOR ANYONE.
It's why I train to be strong [as hec] -- it's why I feed my body good foods, drink lots of water, make mobility/flexility a staple of my training, and do my best to get plenty of rest.
I didn't become a yoga teacher and start lifting kettlebells because I enjoyed it -- in fact I hated it and procrastinate more than you know.
But I do it because I want to be happy.
To be happy -- I MUST love myself.
And the key to sustained happiness it to discipline one's behavior.
Strength training with kettlebells is what keeps my body resilient -- so I can train Jiu-Jitsu.
It's how I've been able to still be going strong on the mat after 19 years, and not waking up the next morning "feeling broken".
So when I feel down, have a bad day, and I hear Goliath walking my way and can even feel the evil grin he has on his smug face...
... I stop, look back, and say, "Goliath? ... NEVER heard of her!" -- then grab my bags and head to the gym and lift or train Jiu-Jitsu.
So let me ask you...
... who or what is the Goliath in your life?
Is it losing weight?
Maybe it's Getting stronger to make daily tasks in your day, easier?
Or it's going to your first Jiu-Jitsu class to...
... gain back the power stolen from you by the person you trusted the most?
Maybe it's leaving a job you know isn't fulfilling you -- even if it pays VERY well?
How do you plan on bringing this giant down in your life?
And how do you plan on keeping this giant down -- because he will never go away.
(He's always there, waiting to catch you at a vulnerable moment, a moment of weakness)
If you care to share, I'm happy to listen -- drop a comment or email me here.
Have a great week.
Yours in Strength and Power,
P.S. If you've been struggling to face your Goliath (what ever it is) -- I don't recommend going it alone.
I didn't face mine alone.
Without my fellow man and BJJ brothers -- I would be lost and boiling in a steamy batch of self-pity.
I've opened a few slots the next 7 days for a 60 Minute Strategy Call -- I'd you to chat with ya to see where you're at and what you'd like to change in the next 3 months, you can schedule a time here.
("Peace be with you" in Spanish).
P.P.S. I'm grateful for my past -- as it's made me the man I am today and if I had to do it all over again, I wouldn't change a thing -- because I wouldn't have met my wife, I wouldn't have my kids, nor would I have become the proud Catholic Man I AM today.